11.11.23
happy birthday dad!!
i went to today with this guy i met online. a dating app, not just some random place online lol. i don’t know if you’d like him, but i think you would. his name is . we’ve been seeing each other for about a month. he works at the . part of me thinks you’d get along and part of me thinks you might hate him. i’m leaning towards the former though. i don’t know if he knew, but our little trip felt like an homage to you.
i’m in now, i can’t remember if i told you about it last year, but i finally moved! my major is game design now and i’m living in & going to the school in the city. i feel better here, but you can never run from yourself. some days are definitely better than others. i miss my friends, but i still talk to them a lot online. i miss you a lot. i think i’m getting over my anger, but i know it will come back around. it always seems to, but eventually i hope it will refuse to return.
there’s this list of questions, i doubt you’ve heard of it, but it’s called the 36 questions that will make you fall in love. it was a social experiment done in the 90s and the first question is “if you could have any one person in the world as a dinner guest, who would it be?”. and it’s the easiest answer in the world for me. the older i get, the more i just wish you could tell me stories. i wish you could give me a hug and we could drink some mead and you could tell me stories you’re not legally allowed to disclose to me. i wish i could tell you everything about everything and ask you for advice. i wish you could answer all of my 10 billion questions. i wish you would walk through the door and i could jump into your arms again. even though i don’t think about you every single day, i miss you so much more than that. i don’t know if you’re still out there anywhere, but i hope wherever you are, you’re having an amazing birthday. if you get this anytime soon, you should visit me in a dream or something. it’s been a while.
a stupid, stupid amount of love,
rhiannon :p <3